You cannot force an adult into care, but you can change the odds: specific observations instead of labels, one concrete door instead of ten options, an offer to go along, and patience - people often accept help weeks after refusing it.
The emergency exception overrides everything: talk of suicide, self-harm, or danger to others means act now - 988 in the US, your local crisis line, or an ER. And protect your own footing: caregiver burnout is real, and you cannot carry it for them.
What to do
Common questions
How do I help someone who won't get help?
The honest frame first: adults generally cannot be forced into treatment, so the goal is changing the odds, not winning an argument. What works better than pressure: specific observations instead of labels - "you have stopped answering texts and you missed work twice" lands where "you are depressed" invites denial. One door instead of ten options - offer a single concrete step (a name, a number, an appointment you will help book) rather than a menu of resources. Company - "I will drive you" or "I will sit with you while you call" moves people who will not move alone. And patience - planting the seed and staying in the relationship usually beats the ultimatum; people often accept help weeks after refusing it. The limits: you cannot carry it for them, and your own support matters too - caregiver burnout is real. The emergency exception overrides all of this: talk of suicide, self-harm, or being a danger to others means act now - call or text 988 in the US, or your local crisis line, or go to an ER; that is the one moment to push past their refusal. Pymander, a free AI doctor available 24/7 by text, can help you rehearse the conversation.